Owing perhaps to the drugs I have been taking, I have been having a lot of vivid dreams lately.
In one of the dreams, my dead mother visited me, as her dead self. I was in my room, sleeping, and my housemates were there, and she said "Pumunta ko dito kasi hindi mo na kaya." Then I asked whether it was also her I have been seeing on previous occasions, because it was not exactly the first time I dreamt about her. She confirmed that it was also her. She said we would be going home, and I was half-expecting that we would teleport, but instead we commuted which took us quite a while to get home. My sisters were hugging her. I was hugging her, she seemed so frail. Then when I told her sisters to say goodbye, because she had to go, she told her sister that they would be seeing each other soon.
When I woke up, I told my housemates about the dream. I didn't know whether I want to feel happy or sad or scared. I felt the profound desire to weep, I can feel the weep wanting to gush out of my guts. But I didn't cry.###
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