Last month, Mrs. G. invited me to speak in front of class officers on the subject of leadership. She said that I can speak about anything about the subject.
I was more than hesitant at first to give the lecture because I do not consider myself qualified. This invitation also came after me quitting school unceremoniously and taking an extended sick leave from work for almost two months.
But I took on the invitation as a challenge. I haven’t spoken before a crowd since that fateful day in July (or was it August?). I thought that hey, maybe I can do this.
Ando so I prepared my presentation. I did extensive research care of Google and Wikipedia, hehehe, brushed up on leadership, recalled some of the concepts from Stephen Covey, reviewed the Johari window, recalled my humbling experience in the SSC Elections when I was in my fourth year, and slept at two in the morning the day before. The seminar was at 8 in the morning the next day, so good luck with that.
I took half a pill, fearing that I would not be able to get up early, as I will be coming from our house in Quezon City. I woke up at 6:30 in the morning (I set my alarm clock at 5:15 in the morning), and I arrived at my alma mater at a little past 8. I was late!
After the very generous introduction, I started speaking about leadership. Initially, I apologized for three things: that I was late because I came from Manila, that I am a writer by profession and I am not really trained at public speaking, and that I had no time to shave my legs. They laughed at that.
So I proceeded with the presentation. Morning session, okay. Group workshop, okay. Lunch break super okay. Ice-breaker, okay. Then we continued with the module for the afternoon. It must have been the time - it was siesta time, and I must be really boooooring as a speaker, but I saw one girl with her eyes closed. I thought that she must be really digging what I am talking about and closing her eyes in utter concentration, or she is simply sleeping. I don't know, I just snapped.
And when I am mad, even English words seem to flow out naturally from me. Before I can stop myself, I gave them a sermon. It rained run-on sentences that day. I told them that I am tired, that had I been in Manila, I would have been still sleeping at that time, and that if they want I can just go home, and all that crap. I told them that being leaders, they are to serve as examples for their classmates, and in that seminar, they have the option to a) listen, or b) not to listen, and they have the choice to a) learn, or b) not to learn. Dressing down nang bonggang-bongga.
I started with the best intentions, promise! I told them that it is enough for me if, out of the 126 students who attended the seminar, at least one or two who be able to learn something. I said it would be alright if my words can affect at least one or two lives.
But I expected better from them. They were supposedly the leaders of their class, the models to be emulated, and to borrow the words of the one who introduced me – the pride of my school. And I was disappointed. Big time!
I had no background as a teacher, but I had a fairly good idea how boisterous, noisy, indifferent and apathetic high school students can be. Back in my younger days, I wasn’t exactly your typical high school honor student, I had my share of visits to the principal’s office for unbecoming behavior and tardiness.
Good thing, the teachers who were assisting me called for a snack break because I was ready to go home just about then. But I realized (and my friend also told me), that I should inspire them, and I should act as a model. And I reflected about what I did. There I was, talking about leadership, and about persuasion, and having a vision, and humility, and with the smallest trigger, I was losing my temper already.
When the afternoon session resumed, I apologized to the group for losing my temper. And since I shared to them earlier my mission/vision for this year - to travel more, eat out more, take more pictures, write more - I told them that I have learned from the seminar as well. Speaking in front of them inspired me to amend my mantra. This year, I said, I will try to do three things: 1) to be more patient; 2) to be more patient; 3) to be more patient.
And when they delivered their output for the last group workshop, and I started hearing phrases like,
"No one has reached the bridge of success without ever crossing the streets of failure.",
"A leader must know when to stop, when to pause...",
"I will shove a bucketful of confidence to show the world that I can help anyone, anytime, anywhere.",
"...make the most of every little opportunity ahead and make a difference",
"There is always a better future waiting ahead of us",
"The vision of enhancing our thoughts, words and acts will lead and take us to our peaks.",
"...significance of cooperation, teamwork and trust",
"we are never too young to make a change",
"Dream lofty dreams, for when you dream, you shall become."
I was touched. Their words moved me. And so before I left, I thank them for the wonderful experience and hoped that this training would not be my last. Just as I wish that they learn something from me, I surely learned a lot from them. ###
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